Sixty years later, Ray Blouin still firmly believes in the power of music.
Now the assistant director with the Buena Vista branch of the Valley Program for Aging Services from 2005 to 2023, Blouin was once signed to Radio Corporation of America Records in the 1960s as a member of The Wayfarers, a folk music group.
Musically, Blouin can’t compete with his former self. However, it doesn’t stop him or his friends from having fun trying.
“I’m an old folk singer from way back,” Blouin said. “Now, I’m an old guy. As we age, all of us have found that we can’t play like we used to. We laugh about it when we mess up, and it’s fine. That’s very important at our age.”
While he may not strike every chord, Blouin is one of the fortunate ones. He’s found a way to age gracefully while still experiencing community.
For many older adults, the challenges of how to flourish and find community in their golden years are not easily solved.
“There are lots of concerns for folks that are living independently that don’t have family members or neighbors that they can call on,” said Lindsay Combs, who works at Shenandoah Valley Social Services in Waynesboro. “We receive approximately 400 calls per month for adult services and adult protective services.”
In 2023, U.S. Surgeon General Vivek Murthy released a study finding that social isolation among older adults accounts for $6.7 billion in excess Medicare spending every year.
“We are now seeing the leading edge of the boomers age into not being able to do everything on their own,” said Jeri Schaff, who was the longtime executive director at Valley Program for Aging Services in Buena Vista until 2023. “That’s very difficult for my generation. We were going to be young forever. We were never going to trust anyone over 30.”
Trust was never a problem for Ophelia “Fawn” Kier. She was able to age in place, largely because one of her sons, Ophie, lives in the house right beside her home. Another one of her sons, Paige, lives across the street.
“Ophie was the first one to move on this street, and if I’m not mistaken, Paige had the second right across the street from him,” she said. “We’ve always followed each other. We like being together. I feel so blessed to have all these children say, ‘It’s our turn to take care of you.’”
Although she loves being surrounded by family, having her own home is important to Kier.
“I still want to be independent on my own,” she said. “I still live in this house by myself.”
The Kiers’ housing model is an anomaly.
Many others work through the high cost of housing and threat of social isolation by finding co-housing solutions.
“At the state level, the majority of people don’t know we exist,” said Harmony Leonard, executive director at VPAS in Highland County. “What we could really, really use is affordable senior housing in the community. That’s not just Highland County. I think that’s every community.”
Elderspirit Community in Abingdon is one such co-housing solution.
“We consider ourselves a community of mutual support and late life support,” Geraldine “Dene” Peterson, Elderspirit’s founder. “I’d grown up in a small town in the middle of Kentucky. Everybody knew everybody. Everybody helped everybody, and so I thought it was the perfect way to retire; where you’re known and where you’re helped.”
Bob Alexander shares a room with his wife at Elderspirit.
“We’re realistic about what the future holds,” Alexander said. “When you’re in your 70s, what that means is you’re going to be in your 80s, and what that means is you’re going to be in your 90s if you’re lucky. And so we’re preparing for that.”
To Peterson, the model is based on a simple principle: Humans don’t age out of needing each other.
“There’s an adage in psychology: Usefulness builds self-esteem,” Peterson said. “I think one of the great things about co-housing is that we’re useful to each other.”
Conversely, isolation is often detrimental to well-being.
“Isolation has not only mental detriment but also physical detriment,” said Melanie Benjamin, executive director of The Center at Belvedere in Charlottesville. “It’s the equivalent of smoking 15 cigarettes a day.”
Schaff has witnessed what happens when older adults lose hope.
“It comes with self-neglect,” she said. “It comes with not eating well. It comes with not exercising. It comes with just not caring.”
Pride can also be a roadblock to flourishing.
“Seniors are quite often too proud to ask for help,” said Anita James, a Meals on Wheels volunteer for VPAS. “For some folks, we might be the only daily contact at least during the week. That, to me, is all part of it. You can establish relationships with people and see them as they move through various cycles in life.”
Through family support or elder care support organizations, hope can be restored.
“Twenty percent of you living a healthy life — and really living the life that you want — 20% of that is genetically based,” Benjamin said. “That’s the roll of the dice. The 80% is up to you. It’s too easy to have inertia suck you into the couch. You need to get out of the chair. Healthy aging is about what are you doing to support healthy mind, body, spirit and community.”
Schaff still believes aging gracefully is possible.
“Successful aging is being able to contribute for as long as you can, being able to make your own decisions for as long you can,” she said, “being at peace with where you are now, and where we’ll all go.”
This article is based on the Aging episode from VPM’s Life in the Heart Land Season 2 docuseries. The series gets to the heart of those creating unique solutions to rural Virginia’s toughest challenges.
Editor's note: Ophelia "Fawn" Kier died after this Life in the Heart Land episode was filmed, but before this article was published.
Watch Mondays at 9:00 p.m. and 9:30 p.m. on VPM PBS — or anytime on the PBS App.
Visit vpm.org/heartland to learn more.
