Play Live Radio
Next Up:
Available On Air Stations

'In Love with a Married Woman'

Original Letter:

I work with a woman who is married. Over the past year and a half, we have become better and better friends, to the point where the attraction between us became too much and we gave into temptation to a sexual relationship. Throughout all of this, she has repeatedly told me that her marriage is on the rocks and it's just a matter of time until things come to an end. I am 100-percent positive that she is not happy in her marriage and she wants out. But she is scared to take the necessary steps to end it because she doesn't want to hurt their friends and family. I know I should leave this alone and let her figure it out for herself, but the problem is I have fallen in love with this woman, and could possibly spend the rest of my life with her if given the opportunity… What should I do?

Elder Response:

Are you serious about the question? You are being played for a sucker. If she really was serious about you, boy, oh boy, she would be running to the court to get a separation and divorce. I know this maybe hard to take, but I've heard this line more often from men, but it's the same story.

I would suggest stopping this relationship before the guy comes after you. Sooner or later he will find out, and then you could have trouble. You're young enough to find plenty of women to get serious with and provide you with what you seek.

Best Regards,


Copyright 2023 NPR. To see more, visit